Staring at the Sun
by alwaysbeingme17
Summary: What if Bella never jumped?
1. Chapter 1

"Are you sure you want to jump?" Jake asked coming up behind me. "We don't have to do this."

"It'll be fun." I smiled.

"I know but it's cold and there's a storm coming." He tried to reason with me. "This is too dangerous. I can't let you do this. Let's just go back to my place." I sighed. I couldn't believe that I was going to give up the chance to hear the voice but Jake was right. "And there's a crazy vampire running around."

"Fine." A howl rang out from somewhere behind us.

"Something's going on." He rushed grabbing my arm and trying to get me to hurry back through the woods.

"Jake, slow down. I can't move as fast as you." I huffed trying to follow behind him. He groaned at me before giving me a piggyback ride back to my car. "What's going on?" I asked as he got in the driver's seat and started driving back to his house.

"Give me five minutes." He commented rushing out of the truck. I waited for a few minutes. I debated if I should follow him, go inside or just wait here. "I'm gonna take you home." He commented getting back into the car.

"What happened?" I asked.

"Harry Clearwater died."

"What? How?" I asked.

"Heart attack. Your dad and my dad are with him now."

"Oh my gosh." I sat down. "Jake I'm so sorry."

"It's alright. His poor kids though. Seth is just barely 15." I had met his kids when we were younger but since moving back to Forks, I hadn't seen them.

"He has a daughter too right?"

"Yeah, Leah." He answered. He pulled into the spot I usually park at. Charlie's cruiser wasn't here.

"Are you going to go home?" I asked.

"I probably should." He looked out through the windshield. "I should be there to help my dad."

"Well he's with my dad. You should come inside and I'll cook you dinner." I commented. He sat back and thought about it for a little while.

"Alright." He got out of the car and I quickly followed him to the front door. I unlocked it before stepping inside and turning on the porch light for when Charlie got here. Jacob used the phone to call around to make sure that Charlie brought Billy here. "They're here, Bells." He commented as I was baking the fish.

"Dad!"

"Hey, Bella. Jacob." He frowned at both of us as he wheeled Billy in.

"I'm so sorry about, Harry." I wrapped my arms around him. "He was a good man." I commented as he wrapped his arms around me.

"Yeah. He was a very good friend." Jacob talked with Billy for a little while. I finished dinner while they talked. I knew that there was going to be some things done and I'm sure they were talking about what the pack was going to do about the visitor that's been trying to get through the land.

I grabbed plates and set the food on each of them. I made sure to give Jake extra.

"Dinner's ready." I poked my head into the living room where Charlie was sitting. I made room at the table for Billy's wheelchair. I moved a chair closer to me so that Jake could sit and we could all eat together.

"What did you two kids do today?" Charlie asked as we ate.

"We just hung out down at the beach. It started to get really cold." Jake commented casually while looking at me.

"Maybe you should have brought a jacket then." I said keeping my eyes on my plate. He snorted beside me making me smile. I could feel Charlie and Billy's eyes on us as I shoved him. He didn't even move.

"Do you have any plans for tonight then?"

"I have plans with my friends." Jake commented. 'Plans.' Hunting vampires. "But I can come over after if you want?" Jacob asked.

"Bella has a curfew." Charlie answered for me.

"Tomorrow then. Want me to call later?"

"Yeah." I smiled. "Let's do breakfast tomorrow."

"Okay. Call me when you wake up and I'll come get you."

"You call me when you wake up." I said to him. "You need sleep. I can tell." I poked the purple spots under his eyes. He clearly wasn't getting enough sleep. I blamed Sam.

"Alright." Once everyone was finished eating I got up to do the dishes. Jacob helped. I could tell he was trying to listen to the conversation that was happening in the living room. "They're talking about." He chuckled.

"What about us?"

"Nothing." He shrugged.

"What are they saying?" I asked putting the dishes on the drying rack and wiping the water off my hands.

"They think our friendship is more than a friendship."

"Huh." I commented leaning against the sink next to him. "You know my feelings."

"I do." He didn't seem like he wasn't going to push it. "But I also know you love me." I rolled my eyes at him. "I know I know. It doesn't change anything." He pushed himself off the counter.

"Are you leaving?" I asked looking at the clock.

"Yeah." He commented. "I promise we will hang out tomorrow." He commented, giving me a quick hug. "Ready old man?" He asked Billy.

"Yeah. Thank you for dinner, Bella."

"You're welcome. Come over whenever you like." I smiled. "You too, Jake." I smiled.

"I'm gonna drive them home." Charlie commented shrugging on his coat. "Stay in the house."

"I will." I knew if Jacob heard me say it, that I wouldn't leave the house. I also knew that my life was in danger and if something happened to me on the same day that Harry died, Charlie wouldn't survive until tomorrow.

"Promise?" Jacob asked. I looked at him. I knew he took promises serious.

"Promise." He held out his pinky to me. I wrapped my much smaller one around his. He leaned forward and kissed his hand. I looked at him confused.

"Kiss it."

"That's weird." I said.

"If you kiss it and you break it, you have to kiss my lips."

"That's not a thing." He kept his finger locked with mine until I kissed my hand.

"Bye!" He called over his shoulder helping Charlie get Billy down the stairs and into the car. I shook my head watching as they pulled away. I quickly locked the front door. I knew that somewhere in the shadows there was at least two wolves watching the house but that didn't make me feel any better knowing that Jake was going out to risk his life.

I waited up for his call. I mostly worked on my homework and did a little reading. As soon as the phone rang I ran to get it.

"Jake?"

"It's me." I could hear his smile. "I'm home safe and sound. Chased the redhead East. I'm sure she'll be back but for now you're safe."

"Thank god." I sighed.

"Embry and Quil are watching your house for tonight."

"Get some sleep."

"I'll see you tomorrow." He rushed. "Good night."

"Night." I hung up and then went upstairs to get into bed. I was worried if the nightmares would come tonight. I didn't get to hear his voice today. Maybe I didn't need to hear his voice anymore. Maybe I only needed Jacob.

I decided to stay in bed until Jacob called. Charlie had left early to go over to the Clearwater's to help Harry Clearwater's wife, Sue, handle a few things. The phone rang and I quickly rushed down the stairs to answer it before it stopped.

"Hello?"

"I'll be there in fifteen minutes." Jake said.

"Perfect." It gave me just enough time to get dressed and brush my teeth. I hung up before quickly rushing upstairs to get dressed and brush my teeth. I combed through my hair with my finger's trying to get the tangles to settle. He got here earlier than he said. He came to the door while I was still fussing with my hair. "It's unlocked, Jake!" I shouted. I heard the door close but then he was right behind me looking at me in the mirror. "Oh my god! My dad would kill you if he knew you were in my room."

"Then don't tell him." He smirked.

"Where did you wanna go for breakfast?" I asked. We didn't have any many places around here to go. We would probably have to go to Port Angeles.

"There's this place over near the movie theater that we usually go. Good pancakes."

"Sounds good." I grabbed my bag and my coat before stepping out the door and locking it behind me. "When are Harry's services?" I questioned.

"Monday. Are you going to go?" He asked.

"I'm sure Charlie would want me to go."

"It's up to you." He answered holding my hand. "Don't do anything that makes you uncomfortable."

"It's not that. I just want Charlie to feel supported."

"I would like if you went but you don't have to." I sighed to myself but knew he would hear it.

"Well then we need to go shopping after breakfast."

"Ugh!" I didn't like it any more than he did but I had nothing to wear to a funeral. I didn't come to Forks prepared to go to one.

"Well I'm sorry. I just need a nice shirt."

"Funerals aren't like that on the Rez." I looked over at him. "A flannel would be fine."

"My dad would not approve of that." This meant a lot to Charlie and I didn't want him to think that I was being disrespectful. "I would love to see you in a button down." He rolled his eyes.

"I only have one and it doesn't fit my arms anymore."

"I'm sure it's too short too." I commented. "I'll buy you one."

"Oh jeez." I laughed. It was so easy to joke and be happy with Jacob. He pulled into a spot before running around the car to open my door and help me out. He tucked me under his arm as we walked. I wasn't sure if he was doing it in a friendly way or in a "stay away from my girl" way but either way, I enjoyed it.

When he walked in, they greeted him by name. I looked up at him as he went over to a booth in the corner and sat down.

"Come here a lot?" I asked.

"Yes." He pointed to the picture above us. I looked up and there was a picture with him, Quil, and Embry. "We ate 20 pancakes, shredded hash browns, bacon and sausage in under 20 minutes." I shouldn't be surprised but I was. I knew him and his friends could eat anyone out of house and home. "We now get free meals whenever we come in." He smiled.

"For how long?"

"A year." He looked through the menu.

"Hi, Jacob." The waitress smiled coming over to us. "What can I get you today?"

"I'm gonna start with chocolate milk." He smiled back at her. She was on the taller side with short blonde hair that was slightly curly and fanned out around her face in a very cute bob. Freckles scattered across her face. "Bella?"

"I'll have the same." I smiled.

"Whole milk is okay?" She asked.

"Yes that's perfect." I smiled looking through the menu. "That was nice of her to ask me if whole milk was fine."

"Lots of people don't drink whole milk." He commented, putting the menu down. "What are you gonna get?"

"Probably scrambled eggs with bacon." I commented. The waitress came back over with our drinks.

"Ready to order?"

"Yeah. Go ahead, Bells." I told her my order before Jake said his. I sipped on my drink as he talked.

"Just coming to breakfast or are you hanging around?"

"We're going clothes shopping." Jake answered.

"Oh that's fun!" We both groaned at her words. She looked between us. "Neither of you like shopping?" I shook my head. I still didn't know her name. I looked at her name tag. Livvy. She was cute. I looked up at Jacob who could easily talk with her and wondered why he never asked her out. She was cute and she obviously thought that he was too. She rushed off after someone called her name.

"She's cute." He shrugged at my words. "C'mon, Jake." I tilted my head to look at him. "Eventually you're gonna wanna date." He sighed.

"Bella, don't worry about me."

"It's not that I'm worried. It's that I want to be happy." I sighed.

"I am happy. As long as you're around."

"I'm eventually going to go off to college." The look on his face looked like he never expected that. "I probably won't go far. We'll see where I get accepted." I commented to him.

"There's the University of Washington. That's where Rachel went." He shrugged.

"I'll have to apply soon." I added. It would be nice to go somewhere warm but it would also be nice to stay close to Forks. I could probably come home on weekends to see Charlie and Jake. Hopefully the danger wouldn't follow me there.

"What happens if someone follows you there? Who will protect you." He asked.

"I was just thinking the same thing but I can't stay here, Jake. There aren't any jobs." He sighed.

"What do you even want to do?"

"I don't know." I shrugged. I hadn't thought about it much. "Maybe an editor. You know read through books before they're published." I shrugged.

"What about me?" He asked.

"What about you? I wouldn't just ditch you."

"I don't want to lose you."

"You're not gonna lose me."


	2. Chapter 2

STARING AT THE SUN

CHAPTER 2

BELLA P.O.V

Graduation was getting closer and closer everyday and I knew that if I didn't apply to any schools soon, it would be too late. As much as Jacob didn't want to me to run away to school, he was the one who was sitting at the table with me helping me fill an application out.

"You promise you won't forget me?" He asked.

"I could never forget you." The thought made me tear up. I didn't want to leave home. There wasn't much that I could do anymore in Forks. "You can come see me on weekends and I'm sure I'll come home some weekends too. And for Thanksgiving and Christmas break." I knew life was going to change a lot but there wasn't much to do in Fork. "I plan to move back once I'm finished."

"Will you take me to a college party?"

"Jake, I probably won't even take myself to a college party."

"You gotta get the whole college experience."

"Get your grades up and maybe you could join me at college." Now that would be chaos. Imagine both of us at one school? I'm sure we could find something really reckless to do. Our dads would have no way of stopping us.

"Wolves don't tend to go to college." I sighed. I knew that his first priority would always be the pack. I also knew he hated it. He deserved more.

"Can you ever stop phasing? Or is this a lifetime thing?"

"I'm sure someday I could stop but then I would start to age." Well my plan A was to stop aging too. We're on to plan B now. "I can control it a little better now but it would be difficult to stop right now. Like my grandfather stopped once he had kids and a wife."

"I see." I nodded. "Do you want to have kids?"

"Only to carry on the gene." He shrugged. "Do you?"

"Not really. But if you hate this so much, why would you want to pass it down to your kids?" I asked. He sighed. I know he was young. This wasn't really something that guys discussed with their friends.

"I guess you're right. Why would I want to torture them with this? But I think I would be a good dad." He shrugged. "I would figure it out if it ever happened."

"You're too young to have kids."

"So are you."

"Yes, that's why I am not having any."

"What if you met a nice man and he wanted kids?" I never really thought about it. With Edward I knew we would never be able to have children of our own. I was okay with that fact. It felt weird talking about this with Jake.

"Maybe not until I'm in my thirties." I shrugged. After that he was silent. "Wanna go do something?" I asked.

"Sure. Bikes? Hiking?" I wasn't sure what I wanted to do but I didn't want to do either of those things.

"Neither. Let's go to a movie or something. Go cause some trouble or something."

"Okay but we cannot get arrested." He commented making me roll my eyes. "Chaos follows you. I'm surprised we haven't been arrested yet." He smiled standing up.

"Jacob." I commented standing up looking up at him. "Let's go get a cat." He breathed out a laugh but I was serious.

"Wait what?"

"What do you think Charlie would do if I came home with a cat?"

"Bella... Why don't you start small. Get a nose piercing." I didn't want to give Charlie a heart attack.

"Uh." I looked at him. "A cat."

"Or." He smirked. "You should get a post break-up hair cut." I sighed.

"Cat."

"My god, fine. Let's go get a cat." He commented grabbing my keys off the hook and heading out the front door. I followed behind him. He got into the driver's seat. I don't what it was with these boys never letting me drive. "You already have a pet wolf. Why do you need the cat?"

"Cause the wolf doesn't fit inside the house." I joked getting another chuckle out of him. He pulled to the animal shelter that was right outside Forks and quickly went inside. "Awe, Jake!" I gushed over a cat. "Kinda looks like you." He glanced over at me making me laugh. "I meant-"

"I know what you mean." He commented. A worker came over and offered to help us. There were a few cats that I thought would fit well in our home.

There was an older black cat who curled up in my lap and was purring.

"I want this one." I whispered to Jacob. "I think Charlie would love him."

"His name is Lou." Jacob commented rubbing his large warm hand over the cats back making the purrs get louder.

"He likes you." I smiled.

"I'm very likable." I smiled up at him. He stood going to talk to a worker who came over to me. "We would like this one." Jake commented.

"Oh great! He's a great cat for a young couple starting out." I laughed at her words. Jake was silent.

"We're uh, not together." Jake corrected her.

"Oh I'm sorry." Jake looked over at me. He kept his face in the same expression but I knew that every time someone assumed that, his feelings were hurt.

Once the paperwork was settled, we were able to leave with the cat.

"Let's go over to Petco and get a litter box and stuff." Jacob commented as he drove. He was quiet on the ride to Petco. He made a few comments about things I should buy.

"Are you okay?" I asked once we were done shopping and heading home.

"Yes." I sighed.

"You don't have to lie to me."

"You know my feelings. And I know yours." I kept to myself as he parked my truck where I usually park it. He helped me grab everything and thankfully Charlie wasn't home so that we could get everything inside and get the cat settled before he freaked out.

I set the cat down to explore the house while I set up the litter box in the bathroom. Jake stayed downstairs and claimed he was going to watch the cat but I know he was raiding the fridge.

"Can I eat these Poptarts?" He called up the stairs.

"Of course. Eat whatever you want." The cat made its way into the litter box. I left it alone and went back to Jake who was settled on the couch with a few snacks and the t.v on. "Want me to make you lunch?" I asked leaning over the back of the chair. I was a little surprised that he didn't take off right after we got back.

"Only if you were going to make something for yourself."

"If you're hungry I will cook." I commented going to the kitchen. I grabbed the chicken nuggets out of the freezer and turned on the oven. "Jake? Do you want french fries or tater tots with our chicken?"

"Tater tots." I began cooking as he turned the t.v up.

"Did Victoria come back yet?" I asked him as I set a timer and sat down beside him. I grabbed the blanket on the back of the couch and wrapped it around myself.

"Hasn't been back. At least not that we can tell."

"I hope you're getting enough sleep." He looked over at me. His face was blank. I knew he wasn't getting enough sleep. Sam had him running around in the woods all night long. "Are you ever going to go back to school?" I questioned.

"Not right now. Not with all of this going on. I'll be fine, Bells." I sighed. Education was important.

"So that's it? The pack is going to support you your entire life? What about a job Jake?"

"Will you relax? Not everyone goes to college like you, Smarty Pants."

"I'm not saying you have to but jobs rarely hire someone who didn't graduate from high school."

"I'm a mechanic. It wouldn't be that difficult to get a job. Maybe I'll even start my own business." It was a good idea but he has no idea how to run a business.

"What would happen if you imprinted? How would you support her and your future kids?" They were heavy questions for a young kid. I'm sure he hasn't thought about the future. I'm sure most teenage boys don't think about what is going to happen in the future.

"Why are you worried about so far into the future? Calm down."

"This is the thing that woman worry about."

"Well what if we get married?" I looked over at him.

"You would marry me?" I asked. I never saw myself as a wife. Or a mother for that matter. Before Edward left, I figured we would just always be together. Plan A was to be a vampire. I'm now on plan B. Maybe Jake would also be a part of plan B.

"In a heartbeat." He answered. I was still looking over at him and he turned his head to look at me. "If I asked you, would you say yes?" I had no idea what I would say. I never thought about it.

"I would have to think about it." I said making him chuckle and turn back to the T.V.

"But you love me right?" His question made me sigh. "Not the same way I love you but you love me right?"

"Yes I love you."

"Then in time, you'll love me the way I love you." He seemed so sure of it. I smiled a little at words. The timer went off and I went to the kitchen to grab the chicken and tots out of it. I gave him more on his plate knowing that he would eat most of it.

"Ketchup?" I called.

"Sure." He answered. I tucked the ketchup under my arm and carried our plates out to him. I set them on the coffee table before sitting beside him. He took the ketchup from me and loaded his plate. "Thank you."

"Welcome." We sat together while we ate. "Do you have patrol tonight?"

"No. Sam is giving me the night off." He answered. "Maybe we should have a movie night or something."

"Sure." I smiled. I had no movies he would probably want to watch but I'm sure we could find something. "How come you don't want to hang out with Quil or Embry tonight?" I questioned. I had seen Jake pretty much every single day since we started being friends again.

"Cause you're more chill." He shrugged. "It's easy with you. You'll just sit there. I have to entertain them." I laughed a little making him smile. "And you're prettier than them." I blushed at his words. "Are you ever gonna tell me what happened?"

"With what?"

"With your boyfriend. I mean I know they left. But why?" He asked. I knew eventually I was going to need to talk about it. It would probably be a good idea to talk to Jacob about it. I knew he hated vampires but he didn't hate me and he didn't hate my feelings.

"Edward's family threw a birthday party for me. I cut my finger and his brother Jasper tried to attack me. They packed up and left."

"And he left you to fend for yourself? Knowing that there were two vampires running around?"

"He didn't know that they would come back." I defended. Thankfully Charlie pulled in the driveway which ended the conversation. I knew that Jacob wasn't going to give it a rest though.

"Hey, kids." Charlie said as he took his belt off and hung it up before taking his shoes off. "What are you two up to?"

"Nothing. We're thinking of having a movie night. Can Jake sleepover?" He seemed shocked by the question. A teenage girl asking if her male teenage best friend can sleepover would alarm anyone. And then the cat ran by his feet.

"What is that?"

"Um... A cat." I commented picking him up.

"And what is it doing here?"

"I adopted him." He blinked at me. "I thought we both needed a little guy to keep us company."

"I just wish you would have asked me first." He commented heading to the kitchen. "What would you guys like for dinner? Since you're having a movie night." He didn't answer my original question.

"Jake?"

"I'm down for whatever." He answered from his spot on the couch.

"So can he sleepover? We'll sleep in the living room." He sighed before looking at me. "Please?" I asked.

"Only if Billy allows it." He answered.

"Jake? Will your dad let you sleepover?" I asked peeking my head around the corner.

"I can ask but I'm sure he'll be fine with it." I smiled before tossing him the phone. Jake called his dad. I only heard one half of the conversation but he moved the phone from his ear to talk to Charlie. "He wants to know if we should all do dinner? At the diner?" Jake asked.

"That sounds like a great idea." Charlie commented. Usually we only went to the diner together but it would be nice to add a few more people to our regular dinner's out. "Tell him we'll be to him in 20 minutes." Jake finished his conversation while Charlie went off to change. "He said I could sleepover." He confirmed laughing a little as he put the phone down.

"Why are you laughing?"

"Told me to protect myself." That could be taken a few ways.

"From me?" He laughed again making me smile.

"You kids ready?"

"Yeah." We both answered before heading out to the car. We sat in the back together so that when we got Billy he would be able to sit in the back.

"I really hate seeing you two back there." Charlie commented as he drove to the diner.

"Please don't ever arrest my boy." Billy said looking at the two of us in the backseat. I rolled my eyes. I'm sure Jacob would be able to talk himself out of any situation. I was a good kid, I would never get arrested. Unless I was with Jake.

Billy and Charlie argued back and forth for the whole drive. Jacob sat next to me with his hand placed on the seat beside us. When we finally got to the diner, Jake and I walked in front of them. He opened the door for me.

"Thanks." I smiled.

"Welcome." He grinned before holding the door for Charlie and Billy. I right away walked over to our usual table and moved a chair for Billy's chair. I sat down with Jake next to my left and Charlie to my right.

"So, what's happening at this sleepover?" Billy asked looking over the menu.

"We're just gonna watch movies." I answered.

"You don't have plans with Sam tonight?"

"Nope." Jake answered sternly as he put the menu down. The waitress came over and set my drink down before asking Jake and Billy what they would like.

"If it isn't Billy Black." She said with her hands on her hips. "How are you?" She asked. Jake looked over at me confused. I had the same react to her when I first came to forks too.

"This is my boy, Jacob." Billy said getting his attention.

"My have you grown." I laughed and covered my mouth while Jake shoved me. "It's great to see you all together." She said before hurrying off to get their drinks.

"What are you gonna get?" I asked Jake.

"Probably the bacon cheese burger." He answered. "You?"

"Fried chicken sandwich." I confirmed. Both Charlie and Billy got steaks. After dinner we headed to Billy's to drop him off. Jake ran in to help him get settled and grabbed some clothes before coming back to the car and getting in the front. "That's unfair!"

"You snooze you lose, criminal." I rolled my eyes but sat back as Charlie pulled onto the street. As soon as we got home Charlie said his goodnights and headed upstairs.

"I'm gonna go grab some blankets. Move the coffee table." I said as I ran upstairs to my room. I quickly grabbed pillows and blankets off my bed and in the closet before coming back downstairs. He had moved the table to the corner of the room and was waiting for me. I laid down the blankets for us to lay on before setting up the pillows against the couch. "What movies do you want to watch?" I asked going over to the shelf where we kept them.

He picked one before putting it in the DVD player. I shut the lights off before laying down. He laid next to me with his arms behind his head. I wasn't watching the movie, I was watching his face.

"You're not very good at watching movies." He chuckled.

"Sorry." I turned my gaze to the t.v.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm perfect." More than perfect. I hadn't felt this happy in months. My own personal sun. His warmth of not only his actual body but his heart made these last few months much easier on me. I knew that he was going through something too. Something he couldn't control. We needed to be there for each other. I planned to be there for him for as long as he wanted me.

"I'm glad you're happier." He commented making me smile before he pulled me into his side.

"I am too." I wasn't myself for months. Everyone noticed but Jake was the only one who never commented on it. He never commented about the bags under my eyes or the fact that I stopped liking music. He was just my friend and he didn't care if I was struggling, he was going to be there.

He was the best friend I had ever had. And I was in love with him.


	3. Chapter 3

STARING AT THE SUN

CHAPTER 3

BELLA P.O.V

Sleepovers had suddenly become a normal for us. Nearly every weekend we would either sleep at my house on the living room floor or we would sleep at Jacob's house with him on the floor of his bedroom and me in the bed.

Graduation was approaching fast. And today a package came in the mail. I was waiting for Charlie to get home to open it. I was sitting at the kitchen table when he came in the house.

"Bells?" He asked. I hadn't made dinner assuming that if I got an acceptance letter that he would want to go out to dinner.

"In the kitchen." I smiled. It was a good feeling to get a package this big. He came into the kitchen and looked to see if I had dinner ready. "A letting from Washington came today." I answered holding it up.

"And?"

"I was waiting for you to get home." I answered ripping the tab off and pulling out the folder. I opened it and right away saw the huge CONGRATULATIONS! right at the top.

"That's amazing, Bells! You're in!" I smiled and looked at him. "You did it!" He smiled hugging me.

"I'm so excited!" I right away ran to the phone to call Jacob. Then I realized I should probably be calling Renee first but Jacob lived here and he was here when I applied.

"Hello?" Billy answered.

"Hey, Billy it's Bella. Is he in?"

"He's actually with Quil. Wanna leave a message?"

"Sure. Can you just tell him I got in." I smiled.

"Will do. Congrats Bella." My smile got wider on my face and I got a little choked up.

"Thank you. Have him give me a call when he's around."

"I will. I'm so happy for you." I smiled and held the phone closer to my ear. "There's much more out there than these small towns. I wish you the best."

"Thank you, Billy." We ended the conversation so that I could call Renee. "Mom?" I asked into the phone as soon as she answered.

"Bella! It's so nice to hear from you! How are you?"

"I'm good." I sighed. "I have some news." I don't know why I was nervous to tell her. Maybe because she was assuming that I was either going to Alaska or somewhere warm. "I got into Washington."

"That's amazing! Congrats!" I smiled. I felt content knowing that I actually got in. "You deserve it."

"Thank you. I think I'll come visit this summer." Maybe I could bring Jacob. I knew he needed a break from the pack life.

"That would be great! Maybe after graduation."

"I have two airline tickets." I commented. It was the only thing that wasn't missing from what Edward took when he left. "Do you remember Jacob Black?" I asked.

"Of course I remember little Jacob."

"He's not so little anymore but I'm gonna see if maybe he wants to come with me."

"I think that would be lovely." She sighed. "How are you doing besides that?" Last time I had talked to her I was convincing her that I didn't want to move to Jacksonville to live with her.

"Better. A lot better. Sleeping has gotten easier. Classes are starting to chill out more. Made a lot of new friends down on the Reservation."

"That's great, Bells. I'm glad. I was very worried about you."

"I'm better." Of course I had Jacob to thank for that but everyday seemed to get easier. I don't know if I would truly ever be over Edward. At the end of the day he was my first love and I missed him everyday. But everyday it got easier to deal with the heartache. There was a knock on the front door and Charlie went to answer it.

"Hello Jacob. And friends." Jacob, Quil, Embry, Paul, and Jared all came into the house with smiles on their faces.

"Mom, I have to go. I'll call you soon." I smiled.

"Okay, baby. I love you."

"Love you too." I commented before hanging up. "What are you guys up to?"

"We heard the good news. We brought cake." Jacob said showing me the cake and hugging me with his free hand. "I'm so happy for you."

"Thank you." I smiled. "Thanks for the cake."

"Emily wanted to bake one but we didn't have time." Embry said smiling. He had also applied to the same school and got in about two months ago. "We're gonna cause a lot of trouble." He smirked giving me a high five.

"Should I order a few pizza's?"

"That's alright, Charlie. We eat a lot." Jake commented to him.

"Well I could grill. We have hamburger's and hotdogs." He added. "Bells?"

"I'm fine with that." I answered. "Make yourselves at home guys. Do you want the cake now or later?"

"Later is fine." Embry answered sitting down.

"Where's Sam?"

"Dealing with Seth and Leah." Paul commented sitting next to Embry on the couch. Charlie was in the kitchen grabbing what he needed to grill. I looked over at Jake.

"What?" Jacob glared at the back of Pauls head. "What happened?"

"Phased." Paul added.

"Can you shut up? Charlie doesn't know what we are." Jacob smacked the back of his head. "They're really struggling. Sam told us to take the day off so they wouldn't have so many thoughts in their heads."

"But I thought they only phase when vampires are around?"

"Well that girl has been around. And it was already set in motion with the Cullen's."

"Are they okay?" I asked leaning over the couch turning on the t.v so they could watch whatever they wanted.

"Seth is doing a lot better than Leah is. I mean for obvious reasons. She's stuck in a pack with her ex-boyfriend." Jacob confirmed. "It's going to take a lot for her to adjust."

"That's awful." It had to be awful for all of them. None of them had any privacy anymore. None of them asked for this. Charlie came and went out the back door while we all talked. "I hope you guys aren't giving her a hard time."

"Well, I'm not. But I can relate to her." Jake commented wrapping his arms around me as he stood behind me. "She's in love with someone she can't have either."

"You're in love?" I asked turning my head to look at him.

"Isn't it obvious? And you know, I'll be 17 soon. You're not that much older than me." I was still stuck on the fact that he was in love. In love with me.

"You're in love." He laughed burying his face in my shoulder. "Seriously?"

"I think so." He shrugged dropping one of his arms. I turned around and wrapped mine around his waist.

"Are you serious?" He nodded looking down at me.

"I'm serious." I breathed in before looking down. "What?"

"This is about to get really complicated."

"No it's not." He commented. "I'm exactly right for you, Bella."

"What if it doesn't work out? I don't want to lose you." He held my face between both of his hands as I still had my arms wrapped around him.

"I can promise you that you will never lose me." Tears brimmed my eyes and threatened to fall over. "I promise, Bella." I sniffled and tried to wipe the tears away before he could see them. Of course he was looking right at me and it didn't matter.

"It scares me." I whispered looking up at him even though he was blurry from my tears.

"I am not him. I'm not leaving." I nodded. It would always be my biggest fear. "He wasn't right for you, Bella."

"At the moment I thought he was." I said being honest. He held my head to his chest. His heart was beating out of control but he was calm. He was holding himself together whether it was for my sake or if he just didn't want to get his friends in an uproar over nothing.

"What do you think now?" He asked and I sighed letting my tears soak his shirt.

"I don't know. I'm so confused." I cried wrapping my arms around him tighter. I liked Jake. Probably not in the friend way that I should. I was heartbroken and confused and happy all at the same time and it was because I was in his arms. As close as I could possibly be to him and I didn't want to move. I didn't want him to pull back. I didn't want to go and face the world. I wanted to stay right here in his arms.

"It's ready." Charlie commented interrupting us. Everyone went running for the food while Jake pulled back and wiped my eyes.

"We're gonna have a bonfire tonight. You should come."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure." He commented. "Let's eat." We all sat around eating together. I sat on the floor with Jake next to me while Jared, Paul and Embry sat on the couch. Charlie was in the chair and Quil was sitting on the arm of the couch next to Jared.

"Dad?" I asked. "Can I go to a bonfire with Jacob tonight?" I asked.

"Sure. Will you be home tonight?" He asked. I turned to look at Jacob.

"It's up to you if you want to sleepover. We'll probably be out late." He shrugged as she shoved another hot dog in his mouth.

"I'll probably just stay at Jakes."

"Alright great. Me and Billy are going fishing early tomorrow morning. I felt bad leaving you here alone."

"I don't mind being alone."

"I'll watch her." Jake said at the same time I did. "She'll be fine." Jake smiled.

"Are you two dating?" Charlie asked suddenly which made me blush. Did he really have to bring this up in front of everyone? I covered my face and groaned.

"Not yet." Jacob smirked. I smacked his back. "I'm working on it, Charlie."

"Jacob! Please." I groaned. I knew that these sleepover's were about to come to a full stop if he kept making comments like that. "Actually." I started. "I have two airline ticket's to go see my mom. Wanna come?" I asked Jacob.

"Woah. What? Where did you get those?" Charlie asked.

"Carlisle and Esme Cullen gave them to me for my birthday." I answered. "What do you think Jacob?"

"We'll I'll have to ask but I would love to go with you." I smiled and leaned into him. I could feels Charlie's eyes on us. The other's were used to us acting like this. I stood up and headed to the kitchen. Charlie followed behind me.

"So you and Jacob?" He asked. I quietly sighed.

"Please don't worry. We aren't dating." I assured him. "We're just friends." For now.

"For now. But do you want to be with him?" I know that he just wanted the best for me but I also think that he was hoping that I would just move on from Edward and who better than Jacob to do that with? Hell they tried to push it when we were children but I was always sent back to my mother and our friendship couldn't go anywhere.

"I don't know what I want." I answered truthfully. "I don't want to ruin our friendship." I didn't want anything bad to happen and then we hate each other. If I lost Jake, I wouldn't survive.

"Bells? Sorry to interrupt but are you ready?" Jacob asked peeking into the kitchen with everyones empty plates.

"Yeah." I took them from him and threw them away before slipping my shoes on and grabbing my jacket. "Bye dad! I'll check in tomorrow."

"Be safe." He commented.

"Always." I smiled following the boys out.

"Let's take your truck." Jacob commented grabbing the keys off the hook and going to the car. I squished in the middle between him and Quil while he drove and the other's were in the truck bed. "I'll have to ask Sam if I could take a vacation."

"I figured that's what you meant. But if you say it's already paid for there's nothing he can do. He can't hold you here."

"He's alpha. He can make me do whatever I want."

"You shouldn't have decided you didn't want to be." Quil commented.

"What?" I asked. Both boys ignored me.

"It seemed like a good idea at the time."

"What are you talking about?" I asked gripping Jake's arm. "Are you meant to be alpha?" I asked.

"Yes. With my bloodline, I should be alpha. I didn't want to be so I let Sam take over. Really regretting that now." He sighed. He was so young. Of course Sam was too but Jacob was a teenager. There was no way he would be able to lead a pack of shapeshifters.

"Was your grandfather alpha?" He nodded. "So it goes by bloodlines?"

"Yes." Jacob confirmed. "It skips generations usually. Depends on how many bloodsucker's are around."

"Hm." I hummed to myself. Learning about Jacob and shapeshifter's were very interesting.

"Every new generation of Wolves are stronger and bigger than the last. My dad has theories."

"Theories?" I asked. "About wolves?"

"Yeah. About why we get stronger and bigger. Or why imprinting is a thing."

"Imprinting?" I asked. "Like that wolfy thing that Sam and Emily have?" He had explained it to me briefly before. I didn't really understand it.

"Yeah. Apparently it happens a lot but so far it's just been Sam." He shrugged.

"Do you get to choose why you imprint on."

"Of course not. Nothing about this life any of us get to choose." I frowned. "I mean would be great to have someone to love unconditionally? Yes of course but not getting to build a normal relationship with that person? Nah. I don't want it."

"What if it does happen to you?" I asked.

"I'm going to fight it." I looked over at him.

"Why?"

"Because I already love you." I smiled a little at his word and looked into my lap as I blushed. He threw his arm around me and held the steering with his other hand.

"You guys make me sick." Quil joked. "You're not even dating and it makes me feel disgusted." Jacob pushed him towards the door before resting his hand on my hip. He pulled up to the beach before everyone got out. I sat down on the sand and leaned against a log while I watched them all gather wood.

Jake sat behind me on the log and stretched his legs on either side of me. Paul lit the fire. I watched as the flames rose high in the darkened sky. We sat around talking. They told me a few stories before Jacob stood up.

"Walk with me?" He asked reaching out for my hand. I put mine in his and he pulled me off the ground before we started walking down the beach. I wrapped my jacket tighter around my body. He was walking next to me but stopped as we got closer to the where the water met the sand.

"You like me right?" He suddenly asked. I turned to look at him. I couldn't deny the feelings that I had been feeling for him recently. I had been feeling very confused but I knew that there was an attraction there. I nodded. "Can I try something?" He asked moving closer to me.

"Yes." I whispered. He held me by my hips and shoved his body right up against mine. He moved one hand to the back of my neck and the other was resting on my back. He moved his forehead to rest on mine before softly kissing my lips. I whimpered as he sucked on my bottom lip before attacking them again with his own. I moved my hand to wrap around his back to hold him to me as we kissed.

He slipped his tongue into my mouth and he tasted amazing. He turned so my back was to the water and his back was to his friends. I'm assuming so they wouldn't make comments about it later.

I pulled back to breathe before kissing him again. I brought my hands to fist into his hair making him moan into my mouth.

"Wow." He whispered pulling back. "Better than I have ever imagined."

"You've imagined it?" I whispered.

"You have no idea just how beautiful you are, Isabella."


	4. Chapter 4

STARING AT THE SUN

CHAPTER 4

BELLA P.O.V

"Mom? Are you there?" I said into the phone. I had finally got the yes from Jacob and we were both planning to go to Florida for a weekend away to see my mom.

"I'm here, Honey. How are you?"

"I'm good. I had a question." I said. I don't know why I was nervous to ask her. My friendship with Jacob had changed over the last week since we kissed. There were a lot more shared kisses between us. I guess I was worried about someone finding out. If my dad knew what was going on between Jake and I he would never let us go visit her.

"Anything."

"Do you remember Jacob Black? Billy Black's son?"

"I know the name." She confirmed.

"Well I was wondering if Jake and I could come visit for a weekend?" I asked. "We were thinking two weeks from Friday." I confirmed the dates while looking at the calendar that we had hanging in the kitchen next to the phone.

"I would love that!" She shouted. "That would be great! I think you both would have a wonderful time."

"Oh awesome." I smiled. "So we're going to fly down Friday night and then leave Monday night."

"Where did you get the tickets?" She questioned.

"Esme and Carlisle bought them for my birthday." I answered. "I never used them but I figured Jacob needed a break from his everyday life." I shrugged even though I knew she couldn't see me. And it was true, Jacob did deserve a break. I think getting out of town and going on vacation together would be good for both of us.

"I would love to see you both. We'll pick you up from the airport."

"That would be great." I answered. "Thank you."

"So, Jake huh? Is something going on with you guys?" She asked making me blush. I tried to stamper out a response but she laughed before I could. "Do you like him?" I hadn't even admitted it to myself yet why was I going to tell my mother that I liked him?

"I have... Feelings for him." I said. "God, I feel like a 12 year old who has a crush on her best friend."

"How does he feel about you?"

"Mutual. He's made his feelings clear. I haven't told him anything yet." I was probably going to keep this to myself for a little while longer. As much as I liked Jacob I don't think I was ready to jump into a new relationship. I also didn't want to ruin our friendship. "And please don't say anything when we come to visit. Let me handle this."

"Bella, it's okay to move on." She said softly. "If Jake makes you happy and you want to be with him, don't let past events stop you." I sighed. It was a lot more complicated than people were making it. I didn't want to ruin our friendship and I did not want to hurt Jacob in anyway. "You don't have to feel guilty about being happy."

"He does make me happy." I commented. "I just don't know if I'm ready to take it to the next step."

"That's okay. But if he's in it for the long run, if he wants to be there to help you, I think it would be a good thing for you."

"I think it would be an awesome thing but like I said. I want to wait."

"I'll support you either way. You make the decisions on how fast you move in this life. Some people need that extra time and there's nothing wrong with it. Jake is also younger than you, there's no rush to do anything."

"Yeah." The front door opened and Charlie came in with a box of pizza. "I gotta go mom, Dad's home." I commented.

"Alright honey. I love you."

"Love you too. Bye." I commented before hanging up.

"Renee?" He asked setting the box down and grabbing two plates.

"Yeah. I was just asking her if it would be okay for me and Jake to go see her." I answered opening the box and picking a piece. "It's still okay that I'm taking him right?"

"Yes. I think you both need to get out of here for a little while. Sit on a nice warm beach." I smiled. "Get a tan." He joked.

"I'm sure I will not be tanning." I commented. "But Billy said Jacob could go. Maybe we'll go an amusement park or something while we're there."

"Just be careful." He commented as we ate.

"Always am."

*TWO WEEKS LATER*

"You know I've never been on a plane right?" Jacob asked. We got their early so that we could be first in line. On this flight we got to choose where we sat. If we sit at the emergency exit he will have a lot more leg room.

"I know. Don't worry." I held his hand tight in mine.

"But you know if this plane goes down I'll survive and you won't right?" He asked.

"I'm sure the plane wont go down." I laughed as he sat in the window seat. I sat right next to him and prayed that no one would sit next to me. Not that it would be a big deal but Jake was huge and it would be uncomfortable for both of us to be squished together. Not that he would mind it. "How's Leah doing?" I asked trying to get his mind off the fact that the plane was minutes away from taking off.

"Not good. She's really struggling." He answered. "And the guys aren't helping." He had told me that he wasn't trying to make her life harder but I also knew that when he was with his friends he was a different person. "You should hang out with her sometime." He casually commented.

"I've thinking about it but I don't know her."

"I'll introduce you. You guys can relate." He commented throwing his arm over me and pulling me into his side.

"That's what I was thinking. It sucks she has to be around Sam though." I frowned looking at him.

"When do they come around with snacks?" He asked.

"Once the plane is in the air. What do you want?" I asked. "I'll ask the flight attendant for it."

"Pretzels. And a coke."

"Will do." I smiled. As soon as the plane moved I felt him tense beside me. I held his hand and rubbed my thumb over his hand. "It's okay." I whispered.

"It just makes me nervous."

"Wait until we take off. It's the worst part." The minute we started getting up to speed I thought he was going to have a heart attack. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. I leaned into him and kissed his cheek.

Once we leveled out he relaxed. And then once he got his pretzels he was really good to go. He was so funny but I wasn't going to mention it.

"Okay it wasn't that bad." He finally answered making me laugh. He grinned at me before resting his head on my shoulder. "I'm gonna sleep."

"Try not to snore." His snores often kept me up while we were trying to sleep.

"No promises." I giggled and held his hand. Within minutes his breathing changed and he was sleep. I reached over him and closed the window shade so that he would sleep better although he was nuts and never closed his shades so every morning the light would wake us up.

Jacob slept for more than half the flight. He only woke up when I shifted to get more comfortable in my seat.

"You okay?" He mumbled.

"Yes." I answered lifting the arm between us and leaning into him more. He leaned back wrapping both of his arms around me. "My butt hurts." I whispered making him chuckle. His chest moved below me. I rested my head on his chest listening to his heart beat. It was calm and steady. I closed my eyes and breathed him in.

"How much longer?" He asked.

"Probably another two hours." I answered.

"Have you ever peed on a plane?" He asked.

"No. I usually just hold it." There was no way in hell that he was going to fit in that tiny bathroom. "You're too big for the bathroom anyway." I added.

"I'm too big?" He asked. I nodded my head and looked at him.

"The bathroom is small and you're not." He groaned. "As soon as we land we can go to the bathroom."

Just like I promised, as soon as we landed we rushed off to use the bathroom. Then we went over to baggage claim and got our bags. We walked out of the terminal to meet Phil and Renee who were both ready with open arms.

"Mom, Phil, this is Jacob." I smiled. Of course mom went right in for the hug and she seemed tiny in his arms. Jacob towered over Phil but shook his hand.

"Are you two kids hungry? Figured we could go get something to eat." Phil commented taking my suitcase from me.

"Starving." Jacob answered. I smiled walking next to him to the car.

"There's a really good steak house near here."

"We don't need to go somewhere expensive." I commented. I didn't want them spending all their money on me.

"Don't worry about money darling." Charlie had tried to give me money to come down here but I wouldn't allow it. I'm sure he would need it for next three nights trying to feed himself. However he did promise Jake that he would go see Billy at least one night to make sure he was eating. "Did you guys bring bathing suits?"

"Yeah." We both answered.

"I'm totally going for a midnight swim." Jacob commented as we got to the restaurant.

"Our house is right on the beach. Feel free to swim whenever you would like. Just don't drown."

"You don't have to worry about me drowning." He answered smiling at me.

"That's because you're taller than the ocean is deep." I smirked getting out of the car. He grabbed my hand when I came around the car. "I'll go swimming with you though." I smiled leaning into him a little.

"Great." We walked behind Renee and Phil and got a booth. I sat on the inside beside Jacob. "What are you gonna get?" He asked me as we looked over the menu.

"No idea." I answered. "Probably the steak tips with a caesar salad."

"Okay, I'm getting the lobster and steak."

"Knock yourself out. Just remember no one is going to take it from you okay?" I rested my hand on his arm.

"I'll remember that." He answered before ordering and I went after him.

"Is there anything you two would like to do while you're here?" Mom asked.

"I would love to go to an amusement park or something."

"Well Disney World is less than three hours away." Phil commented.

"I don't want to go that far." I said. "Wanna stay local."

"Jacob, how's your father?" Mom asked.

"He's good." He smiled. "My sister is finishing up college for the semester so she'll be coming home so he's pretty excited about that." Conversation flowed easily throughout dinner. I was started to feel exhausted but I knew that Jacob wanted to go swimming.

"Now, there is only one bedroom. So either you share it or someone sleeps on the couch." Mom commented. It wasn't that we had never shared a room before, we've done that a lot. But we've never slept in the same bed.

"I'll sleep on the couch."

"No, Jacob. Take the bed. You'll fit better."

"Just share the bed." Mom smiled. "Don't tell your father's." My eyes widened as I looked at her. I knew that she was just trying to get us to be closer and get together. I shook my head but followed Jacob over to the bed where he laid his stuff down. He dug through his suitcase for his bathing suit.

"We're still going swimming right?" He asked. I nodded as he went off to find a bathroom while I changed into a black one piece bathing suit. I went out the back door where mom and Phil were both sitting drinking beers.

"Did Jacob come out yet?" I asked just as he came up behind me and wrapped his arm around my shoulder's.

"Ready?" He asked. I nodded. The sun was just setting but I knew that he would be able to see perfectly fine in the dark. I got to the sand that was burning hot even though the sun was no longer shining down on it. "Get on my back." He commented leaning down so I could climb on. He held my thighs as he walked down to the water and stuck his feet in.

"Is it warm?"

"Everything is warm to me." I giggled but gripped him tighter so he wouldn't put me down. He walked further into the water but made sure that he didn't let go of me. "Are you sure you're okay sharing a bed?" He asked. "I have no problem sleeping on the floor or something."

"It's not like we haven't slept in the same room before." I shrugged.

"We've never slept in the same bed." He said looking at the sunset. The color of the sky made his skin almost look like it was glowing. I ran my hand down his arm just as he got far enough into the water that my butt was touching it. "I don't mind sharing the bed." I commented. Maybe at some point on this trip I would admit my feelings for him.

"Then we'll share it." I smiled and kissing his cheek. "Love you, Bells." He smiled.

"Love you, Jake."


	5. Chapter 5

STARING AT THE SUN

CHAPTER 5

BELLA P.O.V

On the second day of our trip Jacob had sent me and my mother off to the store and told me to buy something nice and that he was taking me to dinner tonight. I quickly realized that he must have gotten in contact with my mother somehow before this trip because she was giddy the entire time we were looking at clothes.

"What does he have planned?" I started to get nervous. I was even more nervous that we had left him at the house with Phil and who knows what they were going to be doing.

"It's a date, Bella. Relax. Let him do something nice for you." I sighed as I tried on a jean skirt that came just passed mid thigh. "What are you so afraid of?" She asked sitting down as I looked in the mirror. I sighed again. "You're allowed to be happy."

"I just think his feelings are a lot deeper than mine right now."

"Is that a bad thing?" She asked. "Do you like him more than a friend?"

"Yes." I whispered finally confirming it out loud. "I just..." I trailed off.

"He's not Edward." She was the first person to say his name to me. "He's Jacob and I can tell he likes you." She smiled. "There is nothing wrong with moving on." She handed me a purple shirt to pair with the skirt. I was glad to go back into the dressing room and shut the door. I was able to get my breathing back to normal without her hounding me with questions and asking why I was afraid to be with Jacob. I changed into the purple shirt and came out to show her. "You look amazing." She smiled. "I'm buying it."

"You don't have to do that." I commented trying to stop her.

"Please, Bella. I miss having you around. Let me do something for you since Charlie has been supporting you for a year now." I nodded and looked at myself in the mirror. "It's cute."

"It is cute. But is it me?"

"No. That's the point. You gotta put yourself out there more. And it's hot here. You don't wanna wear pants." She was right. And the skirt was a step up from any other clothing I had. It was simple and cute but also me. I didn't feel uncomfortable in it and I knew that Jake would like it.

"Okay I'm gonna change. But I'm getting hungry."

"Phil is making baked mac and cheese for lunch."

"Well with Jacob there wanting to try everything there won't be any left." I commented closing the door and changing back into my shorts and t-shirt. I folded the outfit we were going to buy and headed back out to her. "I'm ready." I handed her the clothes. I followed her to check out. She paid for everything before we headed to the car and back to the house.

"Is there any food left?" Renee asked as we walked in the house. Jacob was standing in the kitchen leaning against the counter drinking a soda. He was only in his bathing suit and he was smiling at me. I smiled back and leaned into him.

"There's plenty left." Phil said scooping us each a bowl.

"Wanna go swimming when you're done?" Jacob asked.

"Sure." I smiled. "Your face is looking a little burnt." I poked his cheek. "I'll go get sunscreen too." I commented sitting down at the island to eat.

"How was shopping?" Jake asked looking from me to mom. "Get anything cute?"

"You'll see." Mom said winking at him before looking at me. From where I was sitting, I could see Jakes back but unless he turned around he wouldn't be able to see my reaction. I glared at her. He spun around and leaned against the counter so his face was directly across from mine.

"What does she mean by I'll see?" He asked. I looked into his playful eyes and smiled. I kissed his nose making him gently close his eyes. I watched his eyelashes flutter on his cheek and it made my stomach flip with how peaceful he looked.

"You'll see." I finished off my bowl of mac and cheese before getting up to clean it. I stuck it on the drying rack before going to get into my bathing suit. Mom tried to convince me to get a bikini but I refused. I grabbed the sunscreen from the bathroom before going out the back door. "Come here." I said to him opening it and putting some on my fingers.

"I don't need this, Bells." I groaned.

"Lean down." He bent his knees so that I could apply it to his face and ears before putting the extra on his shoulders. "Do my back for me?" I asked him handing it to him. I knew I shouldn't have asked him because he was going to be thorough with his job. However his warm hands running over my shoulder's and back felt amazing. I kept my eyes closed as he worked it into my skin.

"Ready?" He asked pulling me out f my daze.

"Yeah." I made sure our towels from last night were still out here drying before heading down to the water. He held my hand as we got closer to the water. "Where are we going tonight?"

"To a little Italian place that Phil suggested." He answered. "I think you'll like it."

"Our first date."

"We've gone on plenty of breakfast dates." He commented. Which was true but I hadn't admitted my feelings about him to anyone at that point so I didn't count those ones a dates.

"I don't count those ones as dates." I answered letting the water run through my toes before moving out a little further.

"Why not?" I looked over at him and had no idea what to say to him. I wanted to tell him. Tell him that I liked him a lot more than just a friend but I was afraid of hurting him and afraid of what it could do to our friendship. "What?" All I could do was let go of the breath of air I didn't know I as holding. "Tell me."

"I'm afraid." I answered honestly. "I'm afraid everything about us is about to change." I sighed looking away from him and towards the sky. "Things are about to get complicated."

"Why?" He stood in front of me holding my shoulder's. "What are you worried about?" I bite my lip as my eyes met his. He pulled my lip from between my teeth with his thumb. "Talk to me. It's me. You can tell me anything."

Before my brain could tell my mouth to stop moving I said, "I think I'm falling in love with you." I watched his face as the words sunk into him and he finally realized what I had said.

"Really?" He asked smiling softly. I slowly nodded watch him. "I told you." He whispered grabbing my face. "Can I kiss you?" He asked. I nodded wrapping my arms around his back as he kissed me. It was soft and gently just like every other kiss we had shared before but this one was different. This one meant a lot more to both of us. "I'm falling in love with you too." He whispered against my lips letting his softly brush mine once more before pulling back.

"I want to be with you but I'm afraid. I don't want something to happen and for us to not be friends anymore. It would crush me to not have you around."

"I'm not going anywhere. As long as you want me, I'll be here." He smiled. His warmth and his energy made this whole thing seem so easy. Like he had all the answers and we would get married and have kids and be together forever. "If you'll have me, I would love to have you."

"Yes." I smiled at him. He lifted me into his arms. I wrapped my arms and legs around him as we kissed.

"Left La Push single, going back with a girlfriend." I laughed and buried my face in his chest as he wrapped his arms around him.

"Now Embry and Quil can stop making fun of you." He laughed as I looked up at him. "Charlie isn't going to let you sleepover anymore." I commented moving away from him so I could dip my body lower into the water and move further out. He followed me as I swam out further before wrapping my arms around him. He held us up as we floated.

"They already think we're dating I just never corrected them." He said making me shake my head.

"Of course you didn't." I dipped my hair into the water. "So they think we do more at these sleepover's I'm assuming."

"Yup." He grinned at me.

"And you haven't corrected them on that either."

"Nope." I giggled as I moved from his chest to rest on his back as he swam. "I should have know that you liked me. Your mom was so excited when I called her and asked if while we were here if I could take you to dinner. She was like screaming about it."

"I told her before we came here. That's why she insisted we sleep in the bed together. To see if I would finally admit to you that I liked you." He laughed at my words. "Charlie is going to freak out."

"We can sneak around him." Jacob said.

"I think not." He would eventually find out that we were dating either through Jacob himself not being able to keep his hands and lips to himself or from my mother who had no idea how to keep a secret. "He's gonna find out. And I know you're gonna go blabbing to your friends who will tell Billy, who will tell my dad. I would rather just come out and tell him ourselves." He sighed.

We stayed in the water for another hour before we decided to walk down the beach to some rocks. Jacob had no problem walking on them and picking up sea creatures that he found. I however decided to just sit and watch him. He made a few friends with a group of kids a few years younger than us who were too afraid to pick up crabs so Jake held one so they could see.

"Bells? Wanna come over and look?" He called for me. I stood and carefully walked towards them. One I was close enough he reached his free hand out to help me. I crouched down to the kids level as we looked at the crab in Jake's hand. I held onto his arm as we all looked.

"We're gonna have to head back soon." He said to me.

"Awe." One of the kids complained. "But we're having fun with you, Jake." I smiled at Jake.

"Made some friends Jake?" I asked.

"Yes. This is Ellie, Jordan, Olivia, Tom, and Tom's little sister Odette." Jake said pointing out each of them to me. "This is my girlfriend, Bella." He said to the kids.

"Girlfriend?" Ellie said.

"Yes, girlfriend." Jake confirmed as he put down the crab. "And I'm her boyfriend." He stood up pulling him with me. "Do you guys live here?" He asked.

"Yeah." Odette confirmed. "Will you come hang out tomorrow?" It warmed my heart that these kids took a liking to him.

"Sure. We'll come out when we wake up." He answered smiling. "But we leave on Monday morning."

"Leave? Where are you going?" She asked.

"We live in Washington." Jake answered helping me off the rocks as the kids followed behind us. Jake helped each of them off the rocks. They pointed out their house that was only three houses down from moms so we walked with them.

"So what are you doing in Florida?" Jordan asked. He looked like he was the oldest of the group. I held Jake's hand as the kids walked in front of us.

"We're visiting my mom." I answered.

"If your mom lives here why do you live in Washington?"

"Cause my dad lives in Washington." I answered. As we got closer to the house I could tell that they were trying to get us to stay and hang out with them. I knew I needed to shower and get ready for this date. "If you guys are out when we get back we'll come hang out."

"Bed time is 9." Odette commented.

"So we'll see you tomorrow. We're going to dinner and will probably be home late." Jacob said as I headed towards the house.

"Bye!" I shouted waiting for Jacob to follow behind me. If I didn't leave he would have stood there forever talking with them.

"I'll let you shower first cause I'm sure I won't take too long."

"I won't take that long but I'm showering first anyway." I answered heading to my moms bathroom to shower. Her shower had better water pressure. I showered as fast as I could before getting out. "Mom?" I called out the door. She came into the room.

"What's up?" She asked as I wrapped a towel around myself.

"What should I do with my hair?" I asked her.

"Let it air dry. Light makeup?" She asked. I just looked at her. I didn't bring makeup with me and I had no idea how to do it anyway.

"No." I answered. "But Jake needs to get in here and shower so I'll go to the other bathroom." I grabbed my clothes and headed to the other bathroom. "Jake shower is ready for you." I called closing and locking the door. I dried off before getting dressed. I dried my hair a little so it wouldn't get my shirt wet. I suddenly got nervous as I looked at myself in the mirror. I don't know why. It was Jake.

When I stepped out of the bathroom I could see him standing in the kitchen. I took a deep breath before going over to him.

"Ready?" I asked him. He turned around and looked at me.

"Wow." He smiled. "You're so beautiful." I blushed looking down at my feet.

"Thank you." I smiled grabbing his hand.

"You can take our car." Phil handed Jake the keys. "Try to be back before midnight." He looked from Jake to me. I nodded as I grabbed my purse. I walked out the front door and to the car where Jake held the door open for me.

"Thanks." I smiled getting in, before closing the door he leaned down and quickly kissed me. He then ran around the car and got in. "Do you know how to get there?" I asked.

"Yeah. Phil showed me while you were shopping." He confirmed pulling out of the driveway. "Don't you worry, Honey." He grinned at me. I held his hand in mine as he drove. I reached to turn the radio on and he seemed shocked.

"What?"

"Not use to listening to music with you." He said. "You're happy." It wasn't a question.

"I'm so happy."

The restaurant was huge and crowded and I automatically got nervous when we walked in. Jake kept his arm around me as he guided me to our table in the middle of the room. He pushed my chair in for me as I looked around.

"I'll keep you safe." He said sitting down across from me. I nodded as our waitress came over and introduced herself. Jake kindly smiled up at her and it made me jealous.

"Can I get you anything to drink?"

"I'll have a water with lemon. And a coke." He answered her. "Bells?"

"Same." I smiled.

"You got it." She said before leaving. I looked over the menu trying to decide what to have.

"Oh they have personal pizza's!" I said excited. "I'm getting the buffalo chicken one." I said as our drinks were placed on the table.

"Are you ready to order?" She asked turning to me first.

"Yeah. I'm gonna have the buffalo chicken personal pizza with extra blue cheese on the side." I answered closing the menu and handing it to her.

"I'm gonna have the chicken parm with bowtie pasta and extra sauce." Jake said handing her the menu.

"Alright." She wrote everything down. "I'll go put that in now, would you like bread?"

"Please." Jake answered as she rushed off.

"She's giving you eyes, Jacob." I sipped on my drink.

"Does it make you jealous?" He chuckled as he leaned back and crossed his arms which made his muscles pop out.

"Yeah, it does." I answered.

"Didn't take you as the jealous type Miss. Swan." He grinned leaning forward toward me. His minty breath blew over my face as I leaned in. "I only have eyes for you." I knew it was true. I knew that he didn't look at anyone else like he looked at me. I smiled meeting his eyes. "So when did you know?"

"Know what?" I asked.

"That you were falling in love with me." He cockily smiled at me. "Your words." I shook my head and looked down.

"I'm not sure. Somewhere along the way." I answered leaning my elbows on the table and resting my head in my hands looking at him. "You did say it was going to happen. You make me happy."

"I was expecting it to take years." He said honestly. "I know why you're afraid. Because he left. I'm not leaving."

"I know you're not." I said. "Even though I know it, it still scares me. It's always going to be a fear that I have." I shook my head. "I really loved him."

"I know you did. And it's okay to move on."

"I have moved on." I answered.

"You also know it's okay to talk about right? It was a huge part of your life and you don't need to just forget about it." I nodded at his words. It didn't matter to Jake that there was someone before him. At the end of the day he was still my friend and he was still going to act like a friend not just an overprotective boyfriend. "I don't like him. You know that. And not just because he's a blood sucking leech. He left you a shell of a human being."

"Couples break up, Jake." I commented.

"Couples don't break up the way he broke up with you." He reached across the table to hold my hand. Our waitress came over and put our food down.

"Can I get you anything else?" She asked.

"I think we're good." I said before she rushed off to the next table. I traded Jake a piece of pizza for some of his chicken. We mostly ate in silence. He paid the bill before leading me back out to the car.

"I heard that we're allowed to have fires on the beach here." He smiled. "Would you like to join me?" He asked on the car ride back.

"I would love to." I smiled holding his hand. When we got back mom and Phil were already out on the beach with a group of people having a fire. "The kids are there." I commented as I took my shoes off and heading out to everyone.

"Bella!" Odette shouted running over to hug me.

"Hey." I smiled gently wrapping my arms around her.

"You guys know each other?" Renee asked.

"We met earlier when we were playing on the rocks. And her boyfriend, Jake."

"Boyfriend huh?" Mom said making me blush. I shook my head before looking at Jake. He sat down in the sand and pulled me onto his lap. "Boyfriend?" I nodded looking at her.

"Would anyone like to hear some stories about the tribes where we live?" I looked at him. Of course to these people they were only going to be stories. To me, they were real and we were both living it. As Jake told stories of his ancestors, I found myself leaning further and further into him. I have heard the stories before. A few people asked questions. The kids we met earlier were very interested in knowing if the wolves were real and if Jacob knew any.

It felt right being here in his arms listening to him talk about his tribes. I felt protected and like nothing was going to hurt me. I liked sitting here with him, wrapping in his arms as he talked and every so often would kiss my head or rub his hand up and down my back.

I was excited to see where this relationship took us.


	6. Chapter 6

STARING AT THE SUN

CHAPTER 6

BELLA P.O.V

It was difficult getting on the plane and saying goodbye to my mom and Phil. I was excited to head home and sleep in my own bed. I was excited to see how my relationship with Jacob developed while we were in our own towns.

I was nervous to tell Charlie. I knew that sleepovers were about to come to a full stop. I knew that Billy wouldn't be strict about it, he was never strict about it before. But Sam was a whole other story. Sam wasn't Jacob's father but he was Alpha. Jacob had to do what he said and Sam will always put the pack first. Sam's job was also to make sure that his pack member's were staying in line and not doing anything to put themselves in danger. That included their relationships.

"Why are you so nervous?" Jacob asked rubbing my neck. Our flight was about to land and I'm sure Renee called Charlie and filled him in on our situation.

"Have a feeling my dad knows you're my boyfriend."

"Is that a bad thing?" He questioned. It wasn't so much bad than it was nerve wracking. I knew that Charlie and Billy had been gunning for us to get together for a while. Charlie was hoping for it since I moved here.

"I have a feeling he's going to be more strict." I looked at him. "No more sleepovers." I pouted at him making him chuckle.

"I can sneak in the window." I shook my head smiling down into my lap as he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest. "It'll be fine."

Billy and Charlie were both waiting for us at baggage claim. I hugged Charlie as we waited for our bags.

"How was it? You're not tan at all." Charlie joked which made Jacob laugh. I shoved him a little smiling.

"It was great. Warm. Clear water. Beautiful." I smiled. Charlie grabbed my bag as it came around and we waited for Jacob's. He carried his as we walked out of the airport. Charlie of course brought the cruiser. Jacob helped get Billy into the car while Charlie got our bags in.

"Hungry? Thinking of going to diner." Charlie commented.

"Yeah I'm okay with that." I answered getting into the car. Jacob slid in beside me and held my hand. I tried to act normal for Charlie's sake. I knew that if he knew, it was going to be a hard change for him. It was hard for me. Things were going to be a lot different than my past relationship.

"I talked to Renee." Charlie started. I automatically tensed up. "She had a lot to gossip about." He looked in the rearview mirror at me and Jake. Billy chuckled beside him.

"What did she say?"

"That you have a boyfriend." I felt my face heat up while Jacob laughed beside me. This wasn't a conversation I wanted to have at this very minute. With Jacob and Billy in the car. "You said before you left that I didn't need to worry."

"And you don't." I confirmed. I knew that the conversation was no where near over. I knew that once we were alone he was really going to grill me about what was going on. All I knew was that I was happy. I knew that he would also be happy for us, but he was going to be a lot more involved. He would always be making sure that Jacob was in line and treating me how he should be.

Finally the conversation shifted to the fishing trip that Billy and Charlie were planning for next week. Charlie had a few days off of work so they were going to try to make it an overnight trip.

"Did you feed Lou while I was gone?" I questioned. Charlie was falling in love with the cat and I had a few conversations about getting a dog with him. He didn't want a puppy because he didn't want to go through the training process. He was thinking of getting an older dog who was already trained. We were going to go look at the shelter when he got back from his trip.

"Yes. He's alright." I smiled as we pulled up to the diner. Jacob got out to help Billy into his wheelchair while I held the door open for them.

"Thank you." Jake grinned as he walked by me. I slipped into a seat while Jake moved one and rolled Billy right up to the table before sitting down next to me. Cora came over and greeted us all before taking our drink order and heading off to get them. Conversation between the three of them flowed easily but I was lost in my own little world on what was going to happen when we got home and were alone.

I knew that Charlie was going to question every little detail of everything. He never did that with Edward and I'm sure he was going to be a lot more involved with this relationship due to the events of the last one. I knew that Jacob would never hurt me the way Edward did but it didn't mean that Charlie shouldn't worry about it. He had every right to worry but I knew that Jacob's feelings were so deep that he would never do anything to mess it up.

Cora came back over to set our drinks down and chat for a little before she went to put our order in. I held Jacob's hand under the table but could tell that he was starting to get anxious.

"What's wrong?" I whispered leaning into him a little more. He shook his head and closed his eyes as if that was going to stop me from questioning him further. "Jake, what is it?"

"I can faintly hear howling. They're calling for me." He whispered in my ear.

"Just go after we eat." I shrugged as our food was placed on the table and a refill on our drinks. Jake ate as fast as he could.

"What's the rush?" Charlie questioned as Jacob was wiping his hands and getting ready to get out of the diner.

"Sam is calling for me." He said with a look of panic on his face. "I have to go." He looked at me. I stood and kissed him goodbye. He hugged me tight before patting Billy on the back and heading off out the door. Charlie didn't question it much probably just assuming that Jacob was sick of all of the questions.

I always worried when Jacob was off with the pack because I knew what they were doing. They were hunting vampires. More specifically, Victoria. Who was giving the pack a run for their money. As they days went on you could tell that the pack was hating her more and more.

I tried to not show just how anxious I was about this. Charlie paid the tab before helping Billy out to the car. We drove to Billy's and I was watching the woods like a hawk trying to get a small glimpse of either brown fur or a red hair.

Charlie helped Billy into the house while I grabbed Jacob's things and started a load of laundry for them both. Charlie said that he wanted to stick around for a little so they could plan their fishing trip. I didn't have a problem with it. I did organize Jake's room a little. It was amazing how he could get such a small room into such a mess.

I watched out the back window as I organized his clothes and put them away for him. It gave me some sense of calm to be doing something while waiting for him to come home. I heard the washer ding notifying that the laundry was done so I went to switch it over into the dryer.

"Bella, you don't need to do our laundry, dear." Billy commented as I crossed the kitchen and headed towards to laundry.

"It's alright." I smiled. "I don't mind." I continued to work until Charlie asked if I was ready to go. I said my bye's to Billy and left out the front door with Charlie. I was expecting the car ride home to be quiet, just like it usually is.

"So, you and Jake?" Charlie asked. I tried hard to not sigh and roll my eyes. I knew that he was worried but this should be the least of his worries.

"Yeah." I answered. "You don't have to worry. It won't be like last time." I answered. Of course I was attached to Jacob just as much as I was attached to Edward but it was different with Jake.

"And you like him?" Charlie asked.

"I wouldn't be his girlfriend if I didn't like him." I answered. Having this conversation with your dad is always awkward no matter what age you are. "I like him a lot." I smiled to myself. He made me happy. He never put any pressure on me to be someone that I wasn't. I never felt the need to act older than I was. Hanging out with his friends was easy for me. I felt like I belonged in their group.

"I just don't want you to get hurt."

"I won't. He would never do that to me." I think we both knew that Jacob would never hurt me that way but we were both still on edge about what could happen in the future. Either it was endgame with Jacob and we would get married, or we would break up. Both were a scary thought but I wasn't going to stress myself out over the future.

"Well you're graduating soon and going off to college, how is that going to work out?" He questioned. From what we have discussed so far, Jacob would come down every other weekends and spend the weekend with me. Then I would be home for Holiday's to spend it with Charlie.

"He's planning to drive down every other weekend to see me." I answered. "I'm probably not going to take my truck with me. I might see if I can work at a book store or something down there." I shrugged. I knew that Charlie wouldn't be able to afford to feed me while not living at home. After the summer I would no longer be working for Mike's family and would need another source of income. Even if it was only a few days a week, I'm sure I would be able to handle it.

"Are you going to be able to handle that?" He questioned pulled into the driveway.

"I do it now don't I?" I asked. I had always kept my grades up while also working a few days a week. It was just to help Charlie out around the house and help him afford food. I got out of the car and went to the back to get my bags. He helped me get them into the house.

"Are you sure you're going to be okay with me going on a fishing trip?" He asked as we got inside.

"Yes of course." I answered.

"I was talking with Billy and we both decided that maybe you and Jake should stay together while we're gone. We don't want either of you to be alone. Billy said you are more than welcome to stay at their house." He confirmed. "I just want you to be careful."

"I will be careful. I'm sure I would get too injured at their house." I answered starting a load of my own laundry from the trip.

"Not what I mean." He said as he leaned against the counter. I came around the corner and leaned against the door frame.

"What do you mean?" I asked. I was starting to get very worried about where he was going with this.

"I just want you both to protect yourselves." I groaned at his words.

"Don't give me the talk." I pushed off the wall and moved more into the living room.

"It's just as awkward for me." He huffed.

"I doubt that. And mom beat you to it like ten years ago." Right now that should be the least of Charlie's worries. "We just started dating." I said further. "You don't need to worry about that."

"You're both young. You don't want to make a mistake that you can't take back." He answered.

"We won't." I answered. I knew just how young Jacob was and I don't think either one of us were old enough or ready to have sex. "We're not ready for that." Maybe I should have a conversation with my doctor.

Then the phone rang. Saved by the bell. I quickly answered it and before I could even say anything Jacob said into the phone,

"Redhead is dead." I was shocked at his words. I don't know how they had managed to catch her and to kill her. "Say something."

"How?" I asked. Charlie had eventually made his way to the t.v and was watching some baseball game or something.

"She caught your scent at my house. We trapped her." I couldn't believe that the danger that had been following me for nearly a year was finally gone.

"That's really good news." I sighed in relief. "That's amazing. You guys are amazing." I smiled.

"We're going to have a fire to celebrate. Wanna come?" He asked. I wanted to congratulate all of them but I had school tomorrow. As much as I didn't want to go and would rather stay up late with Jacob and his friends, there was less than three weeks left and I really needed to finish up my work before taking finals.

"I can't. I have school tomorrow." I sighed. "I'm sorry. But I can on Friday." I said hopeful that they would allow me to join them in their celebration.

"I would like to take you out on a date on Friday though." He said into the phone making me blush. "We can celebrate another night. I'll call you tomorrow. Sleep tight."

"Good night." I smiled before he hung up. I said goodnight to Charlie before heading upstairs to shower and get into bed.

I was dreading going to school tomorrow but was very much looking forward to my Friday date with Jacob.


	7. Chapter 7

STARING AT THE SUN

CHAPTER 7

BELLA P.O.V

I could tell that Charlie was nervous about leaving for the weekend. Him and Billy would be gone for two nights, Friday and Saturday and would be home sometime around dinner time on Sunday.

Jacob had decided he felt better if we stayed in La Push because at least I would be safe there. Charlie and Billy left before I left for school on Friday. The day of course dragged on. Jessica tried to get information out of me about our trip all week but I made sure to keep my mouth shut about having a boyfriend.

Jacob of course was leaning on my truck as I came out of the school. I smiled as soon as I saw him and walked over to him.

"Hi." I smiled, moving to his side and wrapping my arms around him. He wrapped his around me before kissing my head.

"How was your day?" He asked. Before I could answer Jessica and Mike both came over. Jessica smiled at Jake and introduced herself while Mike kept his distance. I mean the last time they saw each other was at the movie's and that went really well.

I unlocked the truck as Jessica followed me.

"So, are you dating him?" She asked making me sigh. "He's cute, Bella. You should date him." I shook my head and smiled. "If you don't, I will." She said making me laugh.

"He's spoken for." I answered throwing my bag into the truck and closing the door. She gasped and then giggled.

"By you?" I nodded smiling at her. "You seem so happy." She answered.

"I am happy. He's amazing." I answered also taking off my sweatshirt as the weather was much warmer than it has been. Finals were in the next two weeks and then school would officially be over. "And we have the house to ourselves this weekend." I commented to see just to see what her reaction would be.

"What are you gonna do?" I knew that we were going out to dinner tonight but other than that we didn't have any plans. Tomorrow we might hang out with the pack. But I also knew what Jessica thought we were going to do.

"Not that." I answered. Jacob came over then and thank the lord he did. He wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me into his chest.

"Are you ready?" He asked. I nodded as he opened the passenger door for me.

"Bye, guys. See you next week." I smiled waving to Jessica and Mike. They waved back hearing to their own cars while Jacob ran around the front of the truck and got in. He started it up and right away started driving towards the Res. "What are we doing tonight?" I asked moving closer to him letting his body warm mine.

"I thought we could have a picnic on the beach. Then the pack were going to come and have a bonfire." He answered holding my hand in his. "I also got a bigger mattress so we can both fit."

"I'm really surprised that our dads are letting us stay alone." I looked at him. His hand on the steeling wheel turned white as he gripped it harder.

"Why?" He asked briefly meeting my eye before looking back at the road.

"My dad had the talk with me this week." His lips turned up in a smiled and turned back to me.

"Funny how my dad had the same talk with me last night." He laughed. "When we haven't even discussed it ourselves." Which was true. Sex had never been mentioned in our relationship. The only time I had ever talked to someone about sex was Edward and he said that it could never happen for us. I wonder if that was the same for Jake.

"Can we... Have sex?" He asked.

"Yes. What kind of question is that?" He asked.

"Well with Edward we couldn't. Because he was so strong he could kill me. I just wanted to know if it would be the same with you."

"No. I can control myself." I really doubted that. He looked over at me. "Are you on birth control?" He questioned.

"No. Should I get on it?" I asked him. Before we do anything I want to make sure we're both protected. I would be more than willing to do it. Of course it was my choice but I was nervous about it.

"Only if you want to." He shrugged.

"I'll call and make an appointment with my doctor." He pulled up to his house and right away got out pretty much forgetting about the conversation we just had. He opened the car door for me before walking in front of me to open the door to the house.

"Okay let's make some sandwiches and such for our picnic." He smiled going to the fridge and grabbing a bunch of stuff. I put my stuff in his room. The mattress he got barely fit in his room and was on the floor but it looks cute. I walked into the kitchen and started cutting up the fruit he got out while he made the sandwiches. "What kind do you like?" He asked.

"Turkey." I answered. After he made our sandwiches he pulled out some mason jars and filled them with ice and tea. He then packed everything away into a little bag he had and set it by the front door. I watched as he walked around the house and grabbed a few blankets before also setting those at the front door.

"Are you ready?" He asked. I nodded moving towards him. He grabbed my hand while carrying everything else in the other hand.

"Are we going to walk?" I asked. As we walked by our cars and headed down the street. He didn't answer my question but it was answered as he just kept walking. When we got to the beach he set out both blankets on the rocky shore before sitting down then helping me sit. I opened the bag and started laying everything out. He quickly started eating while I admired the ocean. It was dark as it normally was and we still hadn't gotten around to cliff jumping. "When are we going to jump?" I asked unwrapping my sandwich and taking a bite.

"You still want to do that?" He asked. I nodded as I chewed. "We shouldn't. You could easily get hurt. I can heal quick, you can't." He answered looking over at me before popping a grape into his mouth.

"You're no fun." I pouted finishing my sandwich and opening a bag of chips.

"I'm not letting you get hurt because you're reckless." He leaned into me a little. I leaned back as he wrapped his arms around me. He was silent as we listened to the waves hit the shore. Being held in his arms was nice. He was warm, and strong. I felt safe.

The pack slowly started to trickle in. First it was Quil, then it was Seth and Leah. Embry wasn't far behind them. Emily came in with food of course with Sam carrying even more food behind her. Paul and Jared came together. Jacob cleaned up our picnic before we headed over to join the group.

"So it's true." Embry commented looking at us raising his eyebrows.

"What?" I asked.

"You're his girlfriend." He said more of a statement than a question.

"Yeah." I confirmed with a smile looking at Jake who looked smug. He kept his arms wrapped around me as Sam built the fire. Leah sat beside us with Seth on the next log next to her. Emily handed out sticks so we could roast marshmallows but Paul was hogging the bag of them.

The conversation shifted around a lot but I wasn't really paying attention to what anyone was saying, I was watching the fire and trying to remember what it felt like to be sad. With Jake, I couldn't remember.

On Sunday I cooked breakfast for us before cleaning up the house that we had somehow made a mess of. I organized the movies, put away blankets, picked up dirty towels off the floor. When Charlie got home today, we would be going over to the shelter to pick out a dog. We had gone to our house a few times to check on the cat throughout the weekend. He didn't seem to mind having the space to himself.

Jacob cleaned up from breakfast while I gathered my stuff up. I needed to go home and study for finals for at least a few hours and I'm sure he was going to want to spend some time alone too. But of course when it came time for me to actually leave, he had a difficult time moving his hands off my hips and his lips away from mine.

"Jacob." I giggled. "I really have to go." I whispered against his lips as my arms were wrapped around his neck.

"Just promise to call me later." He smiled.

"I promise." I pulled away from him and he reluctantly let me go. He walked me to my truck before giving me one last kiss. He watched me pull away before heading back inside. I'm sure he had some pack stuff he needed to deal with today.

When I got home I quickly set out some food for Lou before started a load of laundry. I quickly got the crock pot out to start making a chicken that we could eat for dinner. I seasoned it before heading upstairs to shower. After my shower I sat at my desk to start studying.

I lost track of time and heard Charlie come in the front door.

"Bella?" He called up the stairs. I came out of my room and stood at the top of the stairs not trusting him to not smell like a fish market.

"Hey! How was it?" I asked.

"Great." He answered as he took his boots off. "I put the fish in the freezer. I'm gonna shower and then we'll head over to the shelter. Is that good with you?" He asked.

"Yup." I smiled. I heard him move the laundry to the dryer before started the dryer and the washing machine assuming he was washing his stinky clothes.

"How was staying with Jake?" He questioned. I wasn't going to tell him that we didn't have sex because that's not something you discuss with your father but I'm sure he would be relieved to know we were going to wait until I was on birth control to go that far. But I wasn't going to tell him that either.

"Good. We just mostly hung out with his friend." I answered. It was partly true. On Friday we hung out with his friends but on Saturday we went out for breakfast then went to my house to check on Lou. At some point on Saturday we debated going and destroying the Cullen's mansion but decided against it. Then we spent the rest of the night making out and watching movies.

"That's fun." He commented before going to shower. I finished up studying while he did and changed my clothes so that we could go out. While he was getting dressed I called Jacob who wasn't home so I was glad he was out doing something. It felt nice that we were able to do things without the other and weren't attached at the hip.

"Ready, Kid?" Dad asked coming down the stairs fully dressed. "I want a big dog." I knew that he had been doing tons of research about dogs and breeds. I knew he wanted a dog that was older. The wanting a bigger dog was news to me but it didn't matter to me. As long as the dog got along with Lou I didn't mind what kind of dog he got.

He insisted on driving my truck to the shelter which I was fine with. I wasn't sure if the process for a dog was the same as the cat but I'm sure they would trust the chief of police to take care of the dog. He got so excited as soon as we pulled up. There were a few cars in the parking lot that I noticed.

When we walked inside he was greeted by name. That happened pretty much everywhere we went.

"Back for some more animals?" The woman who helped me before asked making me chuckle.

"Yeah. My dad wants a dog now."

"Your dad is Charlie Swan?" She asked shuffling through some brochures that she was putting in the front window.

"Yeah." I smiled.

"And what about that other guy you came in here with last time?" She questioned.

"Oh my boyfriend, Jacob." I smiled making her smile.

"I knew it!" She shouted making me laugh. Charlie was talking to another worker who started walking away to show him where all the dogs were. I quickly followed behind so that I could also see what breeds of dogs they had. We walked around looking at each dog. There weren't many here. A few had already been adopted which made my heart happy knowing that they would be going home. I had questioned why they weren't taken home right away and it was because the family was surprising their children with the dog and needed to prepare their homes. Our home was ready at any point to bring a dog into it.

"How about this one Bells?" Charlie called. I turned the corner and saw a massive Bullmastiff. She was five years old, enjoyed children, loved other dogs and animals and best of all, was house trained.

"What's her story?" I asked the worker.

"She was a Christmas present. Then as she got bigger the family couldn't handle her." She answered opened the gate. "Her name is Daisy." She smiled. Lou and Daisy. It was kinda cute. I stepped into the gate behind Charlie. "We have a family room if you wanna play with her in there." I wasn't sure how we were going to sit on the floor and play with a 100 pound dog. Her tail wagged as she watched the worker bring her into the family room. I sat on a chair while Charlie stood. She sat right in front of me waiting for me to pet her. I ran my hands over her ears and scratched her head just as I had done tons of times to Jake while he was wolf form.

"I like her." I smiled at Charlie. She was super sweet but also very calm. I think she would be the perfect addition to our family. He squatted next to her running his hand over her back. I could tell he right away fell in love with her. He went to the front desk with the worker and they left me with the dog. She laid down on the floor and I got down on the floor with her wrapping my arm around her. She stuck her head into my neck making me giggle.

It seemed like forever before Charlie came back.

"She's ours." He smiled. I wasn't sure how she was going to fit in the truck with us. "I bought a leash here and a collar but we gotta go get dog food." He was so excited as he put the collar around her neck. She got excited and jumped onto him nearly knocking him over. "Down, girl." He said. I loved how excited she got as we headed outside with her. I got into the truck first and then he got her in. She was nearly crushing me the entire car ride but I didn't mind one bit.

I stayed in the car while Charlie ran into the store to get her some toys and food. At some point while he was gone she laid down and took up the whole seat. I tried to move her over when he got in the car but I wasn't strong enough so he had to shove her.

"I think Billy, Sue, and the kids are gonna come over for dinner tonight. Should we make some fish too? I know you have a chicken cooking." He commented as he drove.

"Sure." I smiled. When we pulled up to the house Jacob and Billy were on the porch. I smiled as I got out of the car with Daisy following behind me.

"Hey." I smiled standing on my tippy toes to kiss Jacob quickly. "Wanna take her on a walk with me?" I asked.

"Is she yours?" He asked grabbing her leash from me. I held her collar to keep her off of Billy so she wouldn't hurt him.

"Yeah." I smiled holding his free hand as we walked around the back of the house. She was sniffing everything. She did go to the bathroom but I think I was just delaying her from meeting the cat. I wasn't sure how he was going to react and I didn't want her to get too excited and scare him.

"I can hear our dads talking about us." He mumbled as I followed behind him admiring his back in the shirt he was wearing.

"What are they talking about?" I took a few steps to stand close beside him so his body heat could keep me warm.

"They are questioning what we really did this weekend."

"I tried to hint to Charlie that we didn't do that but I don't think he believes me." Our conversation was cut short by Seth coming into the yard.

"Hey, guys." He smiled. Leah was behind him. Seth right away went over to the dog but Leah stood next to me.

"Hey, how are you doing?" I asked her. Recently she seemed to be doing much better. Of course her father having a heart attack suddenly and passing was difficult. It didn't help that she was in a pack with her ex-boyfriend.

"I'm alright." She gave me a half smile. Seth took the leash from Jake so he could run with daisy. "My mom brought food so you don't have to make fish." She said.

"Oh that's great. I also made chicken for whoever doesn't like fish." I sat down on the back step we had. Jacob moved so he could hold my hand while Leah sat next to me. We watched Seth throw a stick for Daisy. "How's Seth doing?" I asked. Seth had embraced the wolf life a lot easier than the rest did. He enjoyed the speed and the strength. For Leah it was much harder. I couldn't imagine having every thought that has ever crossed my mind being shared with a group of teenage boys.

"He's good. He's handling this really well." She answered. "Wish I was handling it as well as he is."

"Everyone grieves differently. You don't have to heal quickly." I commented. "You're allowed to let it hurt."

"It's not even that." She whispered. "There's things that being a wolf changes about your body. At least it changed mine." She answered. I looked at her confused but she didn't speak up.

"Leah can't get pregnant." Jacob commented. "If she were to get pregnant and phase, it could cause damage. So naturally her body stopped ovulating."

"Well, if you stopped do you think it would be possibly?" Having kids had never been on my mind but she was engaged to be married once so I'm sure kids were on her mind.

"I'm not sure. I'm hoping." She answered. We stayed outside until it was nearly dark before going inside. Lou was laying on the couch when Daisy came in. She walked right over and pushed her nose into him. He didn't seem to care about her and continued his nap. Jake lifted him to sit on his lap. I help Leah and Sue in the kitchen.

I made a plate for myself and Jake before sitting on the living room floor with my plate on the table. Leah did the same while Jake and Seth sat on the couch. Daisy was taller than the coffee table and she was very interested in my chicken. I gave her a few pieces but watched her closely to make sure she wasn't trying to steal off my plate.

After I ate I fed Lou and Daisy. We set up Daisy's bed in the living room but I was more than willing to let her sleep in my bed with me. Sue, Seth and Leah all left right before Billy and Jake did. Of course our goodbyes always take forever so Billy was in no rush to say goodbye.

Once they left I cleaned up the kitchen and headed upstairs to bed. Daisy followed and jumped on the bed before making herself comfortable. I got into bed beside her with a book before I heard a soft tapping on the window every few seconds. She sat up and growled when I went over and opened the window. Jacob came flying in the window with a quiet thud on the floor. We were both silent to make sure Charlie didn't hear him.

"Couldn't stay away?" I asked sitting on the bed.

"Never." He smiled leaning down to kiss me pushing me back on the bed and hovering over me. I wrapped my arms around his back as we kissed. "I just missed you in my bed." I smiled as he laid beside me but because Daisy took up half the bed I was half on top of him. I threw my leg over his waist and was able to get closer to him so Daisy wouldn't be disturbed.

"I'm almost done with school and then we can have late nights." I smiled up at him. Of course college started in August so we only had a few short months before I would be packing my life up and moving into a dorm room. Of course we had made plans for him to come every other weekend to see me. It was going to be difficult leaving him. But he promised me that he was going to go back to school and he was going to try and start a mechanic shop on the Res.

He kept quiet but was gently rubbing my back with the tips of his fingers. I wasn't sure if I should say anything to him so I kept quiet. He reached over and shut the light off and then kissed my head. His final goodnight.

The next morning Jake was gone and so was Daisy. I quickly got up and got ready for school. I knew that most of today would be preparing for finals. Seniors only had half days everyday this week as most of our classes were finished. Friday was our official last day.

Before I left for school I called my doctor and made a doctors appointment. They were able to squeeze me in for 1 o'clock in the afternoon. Charlie seemed concerned as I made the call. I would head right to my appointment after school.

"How come you're home today?" I asked.

"I'm taking today off to stay home with Daisy." He commented. "I just wanna make sure she's okay." I nodded slipping my shoes on.

"See you in a little." I answered leaving out the front door and shutting it behind me before running through the rain to the truck.

Just as I said school was mostly preparing for finals and Jessica asking all about my weekend. She did not seem satisfied about us just hanging out. It wasn't like I was going to rush to the phone to tell her as soon as the "intercourse" happened. That's how she put it. I'm sure Jacob would tell his friends, he was very proud of the fact that we were dating and was going to show off to them at any chance but I didn't feel as comfortable doing that.

"So you really didn't do it after having the house to yourselves for two nights?" She asked. She almost seemed disappointed as if it was her night alone with her boyfriend.

"It really didn't happen. We're going to wait." I answered as we walked to our cars. "He's younger than me. I don't want to push anything when he may not be ready for that." I wasn't going to push anything on Jake no matter how ready I was. "I gotta go though. I have a doctors appointment."

"Is everything okay?" She asked.

"Yeah just going to get birth control." I answered unlocking the car. I would give her a little bit of something to keep her going until tomorrow. I said my goodbyes before heading to my appointment. I had to fill out some paperwork so I was thankful I got there early.

I was nervous as soon as I was sitting on the table thing in the doctors office. I knew that she was here to protect me and make sure I didn't have any unwanted pregnancies. I knew she wouldn't judge me for wanting to get on birth control and protect myself.

"Isabella." She smiled coming into the room. "How are you?" She asked sitting down looking over my chart. We had everything transferred from my doctor in Arizona so that she could keep up with my history.

"I'm good." I smiled.

"What can I help you with today?" She asked setting the chart down and looking at me.

"I was hoping to get on some type of birth control." Something that I can hide from Charlie.

"I see. Are you sexually active?" She opened the chart back up and flipped through a few pages and grabbed a pen.

"Not yet but it's getting pretty serious with my boyfriend and I wanna be protected on both ends." I answered truthfully.

"Okay, we can do that. Your insurance covers all types of birth control. There's pills which you take daily, there is an insert into the uterus, and then there is something in your arm. We can do each in the office right now. Pills you'll have to get at the pharmacy." She commented. "Of course all of them have side effects but most girls your age now go for the one in the arm. That way you don't have to worry about infections, or your parents finding your pills." I know Charlie wouldn't care about pills but I wanted to keep this from him.

"I think I'll go for the one in my arm." That way we wouldn't have to worry about me actually taking a pill.

"Alright. I'm just gonna have you sign some paperwork and I'll go grab it." She answered handing me the paperwork to sign. It was pretty much just giving them permission to do it. She came back with it and it was a simple procedure. She made me wait a little to make sure I was okay before sending me on my way with instructions. She did tell me that it wouldn't naturally start to work for a week and to be careful if we were to have sex before then.

I headed home after that and quickly went inside and was greeted by Daisy.

"Hi, girl." I smiled petting her while also taking off my shoes.

"How was your day?" Charlie asked. I had to keep my sweatshirt on until I got upstairs and was able to take the gauze off my arm or he would question it.

"Good." I smiled.

"Your mom called. She'll be here for your graduation. Her and Phil are going to fly in next week." He commented. "They're going to get a hotel room in town."

"That's great." I smiled. I really couldn't believe that it was coming up that quickly. "I'm sure Jacob will want to come too so save him a seat."

"Of course." He answered. "I was going to order Chinese for dinner. Will you be here for dinner?"

"Yeah I'll be here." I commented heading up the stairs but I grabbed the phone on my way to call Jacob.

"Hello." I could hear his smile into the phone.

"Hey, Jake." I smiled. "How are you doing?" I asked.

"Good. Just applied for a job at a shop in town." I could tell how excited he was about it. "I'll hear from them next week."

"Sending positive thoughts." I smiled. "I got on birth control today." I suddenly inserted into the conversation.

"That was fast." He laughed. "How long does it take to kick in?" He asked.

"A week. The doctor said to just use condoms before then." It felt weird talking to him about this. I wasn't sure if he felt weird but I sure did. Of course we were a couple and we both knew this was eventually going to happen. I wanted us both to be prepared and not have any surprises when it came down to it.

"Okay, see you in a week." He joked.

"Ha ha." I rolled my eyes. "Just thought I would let you know. I get off early everyday this week so let me know if you wanna hang out."

"Wanna do lunch tomorrow?" He asked.

"I would love to." I smiled. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you. Bye." He hung up after that. I spent the rest of the afternoon studying and going over study packets.

Lately life seemed to be changing very quickly and the fast it was changing, the more anxious I got. But I couldn't wait to see where this brought me. I was excited for it. I was excited about college and about seeing where my relationship with Jake went. One day at a time.


End file.
